I'm a firm believer in authenticity. A human being is only as real as they want to be, yet we continue to parade our exterior as though we are all starring in the same low budget film reading from the same poorly written script.
I think it quite an interesting reality that people feel obligated to abide by the nauseating pleasantries that continue to circulate society on a daily basis. The exhausting expectation of needing to say things like " it was nice to meet you too, and don't worry i'll get this one! " If i could be so blunt as to translate, what you're really wanting to say is " I'd rather make small talk with a mountain lizard than come across the likes of you again , and if i have to pretend to want to pay for this average social outing (which you suggested would be fun) one more time, I'm going to have to start turning tricks to pay the bills."
A few other translations include:
"Would you like one of my Dorito's "- I beg of you to acknowledge your impending weight problem and refrain from sticking those unmanicured fingers into my chip bag. Buy your own chips!
"That top looks great on you" - I don't have the energy to educate this moron!
"Thanks for supper, that was delicious"- that chicken was so dry I could choke on pieces of my throat
"Keep the change"- I have GOT to start keeping smaller notes on me!
"It's not you, it's ME" - It's all you psycho biatch, next stop restraining order! "
"How are you" - Let me just get that out the way so that I can start talking about myself.
"Aah your baby is so cute" -Shit darn, I aint never smoking through pregnancy!
"We must do coffee"- Guess i can't shop here anymore!
It is indeed these so-called pleasantries that continue to idealise the rules and regulations of off chance social encounters. Unfortunaltey, it just so happens that we have infact done this to ourselves. Regrettably, there is no turning back for our miserable attempts to save a bit face and make nice with complete strangers! Myself, yourself and the person sitting next to you are 100% guilty of entertaining the above mentioned translations, and any deviation, results in unprecented shock and social interventions.
It would therefore appear that our fragile capacities can only accomdate so much honesty. Too much of it, and we are reminded of the cold truth: Invincibilty is reserved only for war heros & Chuck Norris. It is simply more pleasing to rather flash that phony smile, lie through your yellow teeth and rely on the on- going bollocks that has served you this far.
So the question is, is honesty really the best policy? In an ideal world, yes, but in this one, you've got to shake hands with the devil, look up to the left, and fake it if you wana make it! Just ask any woman ha!
Sad bunch we are!
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